WG's new/Arthur Lee's old mobile sounds wi a tune fae some 80s band naybdy's ever heard ay - our hero makes a mental note to replace it with The Seeds' Pushin Too Hard
FA: Hewo, may I speak to Winston Bwegkamp Gemmell ?
WG: WinninGemmell speaking, who's calling ?
FA: It's Sir Fergus Awexanderson
WG: How in the name ay the wee Jinky did you get my number ?
FA: Catwiona gave me a sewection of phone numbers fwom your bank wecords and those of your fweinds and acquaintances. This one is supposed to bewong to Affa Wee.
WG: Aye, it's Arthur's auld moby - your masonic cronies confiscated mine ye might remember. Huv ye stoapd stickin the heid oan folk yit ?
FA: What are you wefewwing to Winston ?
WG: Boaby Murdoch. 1969. Eftir Big Billy loast yi for the first goal. Ah'll niva forgive ye fur that.
FA: Winston, pwease wet bygones be bygones.
WG: Bygones ? Ye were gonnae stick yir pwick in mi.
FA: It was onwy part of the witual.
WG: Ah'll witual ye. Anyway whit ur ye waantin ?
FA: I just thought I'd phone to wish yis all the best for the match against Viwwaweal.
WG: Who ur ye tryin tae kid ?
FA: I want all the Bwitish cwubs to do well and quawify for the watter stages.
WG: Whit dae yi really want, Brother Alexanderson ?
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