WG fancies a beer (shocker!!), decides to phone his good mate NAFOS
WG: Naf, how are things, buddy ?
NAFOS: Fine, fine, Ah'm looking forward tae the gemme the morra, hopefully a few goals and three points.
WG: Fancy the Teser the night ?
NAFOS: Ah thoat ye went tae Craigneuk oan a Friday night.
WG: Ah cin easy bi back in Wishy fur hauf eight
NAFOS: Naw, Ah canny make it the night. Ah've a previous engagement.
WG: Business or pleasure, Naf ?
NAFOS: Tae bi honest, a bit ay baith.
WG: Male or female, Nafster ?
NAFOS: Ye don't half stick yir nose in, dae ye? Female if ye must know n that's is faur is Ah'm gaun, nae mair details WG. Nae whos, nae whens and nae wheres. Butt oot.
WG: Oh we ARE rather touchy today Mr NAFOS. Are you scared Militia Intelligence will pick up on your little rendezvous ? Only kiddin mate. I'm thinking of a little Love Action masel this weekend. Mibbe see ye eftir the gemme.
NAFOS: Aye, mibbe WG. Adios.
Saturday, 31 January 2009
The Gate In The Wood - Episode 55
GD: Sir Gordon Duffied, Chief Executive, how may I help you ?
FA: Gweetings bwuvva. Tell Wima my name's Fergus not Edward.
GD: Good morning Sir Fergus. Congratulations on a fine performance against Aalborg. Looks as if you've got the group in the bag and the Jungle Jims will be out of Europe before the lights are on in George Square.
FA: Vewy eawy days, Gawdon. I was wondewing if you would care to join me for wunch tomowwow. I'm on a weconnaisance mission at Celtic Park.
GD: I wouldn't eat there even if you were paying.
FA: No, I've booked a table in the Wogano - seafood is the speciawity; pwawns, wangoustines, wobster, scawwops, the wowld is your... er .... oyster.
GD: Sounds good, what time ?
FA: Need to be vewy earwy, say eweven ferty ?
GD: It's a date.
FA: Have you got a sponsor for the Scottish Cup yet ?
GD: I'm currently in talks with Sir Murray David of David International Diamond Drill Yieldings.
FA: Muwway's a vewy good fweind of mine. I will twy and pull a few stwings on your behalf. OK, see you tomowwow, Gawdon.
GD: Bye, Sir Fergus
Duffield thinks to himself 'Thank goodness it's a seafood restaurant as I'm reeking of this macaroon essence and it does have a rather fishy niff to it.'
FA: Gweetings bwuvva. Tell Wima my name's Fergus not Edward.
GD: Good morning Sir Fergus. Congratulations on a fine performance against Aalborg. Looks as if you've got the group in the bag and the Jungle Jims will be out of Europe before the lights are on in George Square.
FA: Vewy eawy days, Gawdon. I was wondewing if you would care to join me for wunch tomowwow. I'm on a weconnaisance mission at Celtic Park.
GD: I wouldn't eat there even if you were paying.
FA: No, I've booked a table in the Wogano - seafood is the speciawity; pwawns, wangoustines, wobster, scawwops, the wowld is your... er .... oyster.
GD: Sounds good, what time ?
FA: Need to be vewy earwy, say eweven ferty ?
GD: It's a date.
FA: Have you got a sponsor for the Scottish Cup yet ?
GD: I'm currently in talks with Sir Murray David of David International Diamond Drill Yieldings.
FA: Muwway's a vewy good fweind of mine. I will twy and pull a few stwings on your behalf. OK, see you tomowwow, Gawdon.
GD: Bye, Sir Fergus
Duffield thinks to himself 'Thank goodness it's a seafood restaurant as I'm reeking of this macaroon essence and it does have a rather fishy niff to it.'
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